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Anxiety

Hello Everybody,

How does everyone else deal with anxiety in the lead up to blood tests and Haematologists appointments? I'm seeing my Haemo this afternoon for my scheduled 3 monthly check up and blood results - as per the pattern, in the month leading up to my blood test and appointment my mind is occupied with not-so-useful thoughts and I've become an emotional wreck... I tie myself up in knots! I know I'm fine, I know the results will come back exceptionally wonderful - they always do, but no amount of chocolate croissants or positive thinking can stop the feelings of dread from taking hold.

Luckily, I work 10 hours a day in a job where I have to focus completely on work or risk losing zillions of dollars for my boss - it's nearly 10 hours a day where the anxiety can't find me... however, the rest of the time I'm a complete mess!

I'm sure I'm not the only one who does this - how does everyone else deal with anxiety?

Have a fabulous day/night, Lynette

Hi Lynette,

 

I am completely new to this as I have been recently diagnosed.  There are so many unknowns it seems that if you try to manage them all you end up a bit messy.  I am trying to get into a routine of minfulness practice.  There are some very good phone apps that help as well as classes.  Focussing your mind to stay with the present and not trying to answer questions that are unknown and trying to find unknown answers to questions is a useful thing.  If you find your mind running off, a quiet five minutes of mindfulness and bringing yourself back to the present is immensely helpful and reassuring.

 

I hope this may help, even just a little.

 

Take care,

Ben

I think we all - or at least most of us - feel some apprehension when the check-up is approaching.  I do, even after nearly seven years of good progress, and I can honestly say that I don't mind the blood-letting process in the slightest.  I suppose there will always be the thought at the back of one's mind that it could all go horribly wrong, however excellent the results have been in the past.  I agree that chocolate is only a partial answer!

Olivia

Doesn't worry me at all. I don't see why it should. a test is merely confirmation of a fact that already exists. As a principle I don't worry about what i can't control and effect. I try to always stay in the hear and now and not dwell on coulds and mights and what ifs.

I try to live by some principles and believe strongly that you can think yourself well or you can worry yourself sick.  I also know I can change how I feel in a heartbeat.

I'm a sports coach so techniques there may help but I think it's all just my personal preferred behaviour.

Then I was also diagnosed way back when I was really seriously life-threateningly ill and so have a sense that it's all relative.

Hi Lynette

 

I'm pleased you started this thread because it is something that I've had to deal with too - I tell people that my CML is mostly fought in my head, as I'm fortunate that I have really few side effects from the medication.  The word "cancer" is such a frightening, scary thought that it would be surprising if one was able to go through CML without any emotional effects, and I think it's much worse at the beginning of treatment.  I have found that strange things bring on the emotions.  For example, I'm a school teacher and have just returned to work after a long holiday.  Now all my colleagues are asking me, "How are you feeling?  How are you really?  How are you coping?"  This is just genuine concern from people who care about me, but I find it brings odd thoughts like "Why are you asking me that?  Do you know something I don't know about my CML?  Do I look bad?"   Totally illogical, but unfortunately a very real reaction.  Like Darley says, I think we can control our thoughts, but since there is so much to get used to at first, it may take some time.

 

Another point I want to make:  I find that I can go days without thinking of CML (except at my witching hour when I have to take my tablet) but, when test time comes, it occupies my mind like crazy.  I drove myself half insane during the week before my three-month test reading academic articles about the importance of reaching the 10% level, and I expect it to be the same when my six-month test comes around (I was diagnosed in December).  At my last appointment I actually asked the doctor to prescribe me something for the anxiety and I think I will use it before the six-month test.  I personally don't believe in psychological therapy as I doubt it would work for me, but I have found exercise, keeping busy and distraction to be a huge help.

 

Good luck to everyone in coping!

 

Best wishes from South Africa

 

Martin