I am 31 yrs and lives in INDIA and here it is very difficult to explain about CML condition to the family of girl.I have achieved MMR but still i feel it is an uphill task to explain that i can lead a normal life too.I have already gone into broken relationship because of this and now i think to marry someone who is facing the same issue or else live in peace alone . Please let me know your thoughts .
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Is my thinking correct to marry a girl with a similar condition (CML) like me .
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Put it this way - if you had diabetes would you be worried about tell a potential wife or her family?
My guess is not as much. I often tell people I have a chronic blood disorder that is managed by medication. In terms of life expectancy, CML patients have the same as those without these days and its NOT genetic so no risk to your kids. That said I'm not very well versed on the conventions of marraige in India (despite dancing in a bharat once). It might help if I understood the issues with your previous relationship.
I'm also recently (ish) diagnosed and wondering on when to disclose to someone I might date in the future, but so far its not really come up. Your attitude will play into it a lot, if you approach future-wife-family as if its a deep dark secret then she may react very differently than if you approach it as "I have a chronic health condition which is managed and under control". They, and you, should keep in mind that perfectly healthy people die all the time without warning, your condition doesnt make you less of a catch. Certainly no need to stay alone if that is not your choice. You've had a bad experience but dont let that get you down.
Note; CML is pretty rare and even rarer in young people, if you restrict on that your dating pool maybe very very small. Others who have had cancer may be more likely to understand your condition and they will be a bigger pool but there is no need to limit yourself to that - I know 2 young indian people who have had (tumour) cancers and they dont let it restrict them.
All the best!
Thanks Evah for your thoughts. I do understand that i had a normal life and chronic condition can be maintained well with medicine, the problem is how to explain this to the girl or her family. I don't want to lie about it nor i want to start anything by hiding something initially . Nevertheless i am not giving hope on it and will continue my search .Let's see how it goes . Thanks again and ALL THE BEST to you too !!
My thinking is that AS it has a good life expentancy, I dont consider it a lie to explain the condition while steering clear of the term leukemia. Often people want a name and dont really care that much whats behind it (CML is a name, you dont need to spell it out). The other option is to say you HAD cancer but everything is under control now. Like people with tumours do.
I applaud your wishing to be honest, there is also a concept of being too honest ;)
